“You have to protect your writing time. You have to protect it to the death.” These are the words of William Goldman, author of the Princess Bride. Words of wisdom that I knew (it’s one of the many quotes on this site!) but had taken for granted. For years I had established a rhythm, a groove that allowed me to comfortably get my writing done for you lovely readers. Then the wheels came off. For the past two months, I have not been able to establish a new groove. I had not, as William Goldman had warned, protected my writing time and the result was disaster.
First off, a word of encouragement. If you, like me, slip out of your groove, if your habits and life get disrupted in a major way, please don’t feel bad. I tend to beat myself up over not hitting my writing goals but in this case, I realize that circumstances and poor planning had forced me to find a new way of working. A new way of creating. It was eye-opening. Here’s what’s been going on.
Before this year I had a pretty stable life*. Wake up. Go to work. Clock out. Drive home. Write. I had the time and the energy to get stuff done. My day had a schedule I could usually count on, a rhythm that tick-tocked its way towards boredom. This was my groove for 10 years (!!), wow has it been that long? I would come home and write, either on the week’s blog post or on one of my many other projects. I had allowed myself to be lulled into a dull complacency. A rut. Doing the same thing the same way, over and over. I started writing more and more of my posts on the day they were to be posted. After all, tomorrow would be the same as the day before. Or so I thought.
That all changed in May when I got a new job. Initially, I took a small break, so I could get my training and accreditations completed and my feet underneath me. I was still complacent though, thinking that I could do my writing last minute or that I would always find the time and the energy to gather my thoughts a write them down. The new job quickly changed those expectations. No longer were my hours set, some days I would be home by two, others days it was well after six. I’ve spent entire months out of town and other times I spent the majority of the week working from home. I really enjoy traveling around the state, fixing issues for our clients. The variety and challenge make the job exciting, but also wreaks havoc on my writing schedule.
“You have to protect your writing time. You have to protect it to the death.”
William Goldman
It’s not like I planned all of this, I was just a bit lazy. I’ve been writing on this blog for a very long time after all, so I thought that I could take on the challenge of a varied work schedule without giving it any serious thought. As things got busier and busier at work, my writing took the brunt of the impact. I stopped writing my story projects first. Then I found less and less energy and time to work on the blog. Then slowly, over the course of a few weeks, I stopped writing entirely (I will talk more about this next week). I was done. I had no creative output. I didn’t even read a terrible amount. I just vegetated.
Here in this wasteland, I came to understand my motivations more. Why was I even writing these posts? Who was I writing for? Was writing even important to me anymore? I had to wrestle with these notions all why trying to find a new way to stay motivated and keep writing. Slowly I clawed my way back. Carving out a new rhythm that, like all new experiences, still feels strange and foreign to me. I had to be intentional over the past few weeks reestablishing old patterns and sitting down and getting to work. Life will always do its best to trip us up, simply because that’s what life is. Yet we do not have to stop what we love simply because life gets busy or our time adjusts to a new schedule. We can always find a new path, a new groove to follow. We can always pick up a pen, a brush, an instrument and start on our dreams again. For now, the dust is still settling around me as I work my way back up to my story projects. Yet I feel like I have come through this with perhaps a bit more focus, I know what I am looking to accomplish, I have a plan how to get there, now let’s see how close to the sun I can get.
*I would also be remiss if I didn’t also include in this category of life-altering events my new life after transition. Having close friends willing to push me out of out my previously anti-social habits has been so unexpected and wonderful. Thank you, friends, for being the most amazing and talented friends a girl could hope for.