State of Play (part 1)

***Warning: This post contains content of public dorkeness and a strong disregard for social standing, read at your own risk.***

So here I am again, at the end of another long winded gaming session my face is red, my palms sweaty and my heartbeat is up. One would think that I would be exhilarated after making Kratos disembowel a gang of centaurs but I'm not, I'm furious. I click the machine off and sit in silence, trying to regain my composure. I sit back and think for the hundredth time that perhaps I am no longer the gamer I once was.

It wasn't always like this. I have fond memories as a child of playing Castelvania IV on the Super Nintendo (my first system and game) and loving every minute of it (except the clock tower level). I remember playing Super Mario World and hopping on Yoshi's back for the first time and making him stick out his tongue to eat things. Sure, I admit I could never beat a Mario game without a cheat code for 99 lives but I still played it over and over again. I remember my time in college, when I first got my hands on a old copy of Final Fantasy VII to help me waste away long nights of insomnia and remember trying to find a way to bring Aeris back (hint: there is none). I have always been a person who has enjoyed video games, one who played them for the sheer joy of simply playing something. I didn't play games of “skill” like Street Fighter or games that were just brutally difficult like Ninja Gaiden, I played games that were fun.

Now, I am a gown-up man child, I buy my own games and systems and as I have changed so has the gaming landscape. The PS3 and 360 are changing the way we play games, while the Wii changed how we control them. The DS and PSP brought us portable powerhouses that were quickly eclipsed by the iPhone, while iPhone developers struggle to find a happy medium between features and price. Online connectivity, huge and beautifully detailed worlds to explore, trophy gathering, social networking; these machine have gone beyond what was previously expected from a gaming device and have become entertainment hubs that more and more of us simply can't be without.

Yet for all the beauty and grace of Final Fantasy XIII or the brutality and violence of God of War III I find myself growing more and more frustrated with my own personal gaming experience. Is it me that's changed or is it the medium that I have come to love that has changed? To get the the root of the problem I have been looking at myself, both as a person and as a gamer for the past several weeks. I have tried out new genres of games and returned to some of my beloved classics to see how they have withstood the test of time. All in the pursuit of trying to figure out what makes me a gamer and if I can even claim that title any longer.

There was a time when I would count myself reluctantly among those known as hardcore gamers. I say reluctantly because I fit the general description, I own a Playstation and an Xbox, I read game reviews, subscribe to game magazines and watch the E3 press events live over the internet. I follow gaming as closely as many people follow football or baseball and I love it. Yet there were still a few peculiarities with my “hardcore” status that precludes me from the group. I don't pre-order my games, waiting instead for deals or buying most of them second hand and I don't like hard games. Period. I never went for the ultra hard, super secret boss fight, that took 6 hours to win (I'm looking at you Square). I never memorized the entire move set for Ken or Ryu, let alone the entire Street Fighter roster. If I owned a strategy guide it was because it came with the purchase not because of some innate desire to completely beat a game. Yet if I am not playing to compete, or playing to beat the game why then am I playing at all?

Over the course of the past few weeks I have tried to figure out why I play games; it is after all, my time waster of choice. Kotaku.com looked at this same issue a few months back and wrote a nice piece on why certain people play certain games. Their choices ranged from the story driven gamer to the gamer who likes to break stuff and is most certainly a good read. After I read the column I knew that there were two things that stick out whenever I recall a game, its story and how powerful the game made me feel. I play RPGs (role playing games) a lot because they commonly allow me to experience both of these traits at the same time. I get to explore a rich world and a pretty good story while issuing orders and strategies to the characters I am controlling. It is this sense of power that is stripped away when clunky game controls or maddeningly difficult sequences are introduced to the game play. These elements get in the way of my gameplay experience, they strip me out of the game world and place me in my living room.

I have spent an unhealthy amount of time playing previous iterations Squares highly regarded Final Fantasy series, I loved exploring the world and was thrilled as the main story arc rolled along to its epic conclusion. I would stand back and issue commands that filled the screen with power attacks, rocketing Meteors at my foes until they were dust. I would unleash demons and dragons upon my foes or have my characters beat them to death with oversized swords. The choices were mine, my characters lived or died based off of the choices I made. I have played every Final Fantasy to its conclusion since numeral VII yet the newest iteration numeral XIII has left me unwilling to go on. It is what happens when you completely overhaul a system to make it feel quicker and more responsive when in fact it is a slow, ineffective system that hides nothing and it grates on me. I hate the cheap shots that decimate my main character meaning that their health can't drop below 75%. I hate having to wait for the menus to catch up to my commands when I issue vital healing potions. I hate that I am told how badly I fought a certain foe, even after I claw my way back from utter decimation. The element of choice has been replaced with speed and automation, I no longer have an effective role as the decision maker and my characters live and die by seeming luck. All that sense of power and enjoyment has been replaced with flash but no bang. Yes the world is detailed, the story and characters engaging, yes it is all so very, very pretty but I just have so little desire to play it any more because I know I will have to use that battle system. And to be honest it makes me a bit sad because I want to explore the world more, I want to know how it all ends.

Eventually my curiosity will get the better of me and I will return to Final Fantasy and I will become red faced and angry again. Is this the price we must pay as gamers now? Is our hall mark to be a bunch of very angry people, red faced and yelling at things that only exist on the TV screen? Complaining that a developer is cheap because the character they designed jumps like a 9 year old? Playing through God of War III made me curse like a sailor and I wanted to pitch the controller, PS3 and TV straight out of my window (at this point I turn off the console before regrettable decisions are made). Sure Kratos can eviscerate a mad cow, twirl around like a ballerina of death and for the most part when its just you versus legions of undead it is a beautiful dance of violence. However, things ramp up fast taking the fun with it. After they throw in a few trolls, a few centaurs and a god or two, I have had enough. After I finished beating Zeus to a bloody mess I walked out the door with the game in hand and traded it in and not once have I regretted that decision. I have played through Uncharted 2 at least twice because it is fun and enjoyable, to this day it still sits on my shelf so I can play it when the urge strikes. God of War III was a series of frustrating trials and pain and while I am glad I played it and finished out the trilogy I am more relieved that I never have to do it again.

More and more it seems that frustration is becoming a normal part of the video game experience, with fun and ease of use being replaced by pretty graphics and online features. I have played through several of my older games (Psone classics!) and indeed they are ugly as sin but there is a charm and an element of simple fun that seems to be missing from todays gaming. Perhaps this is due to the fact that more and more developers feel the need to be realistic. Perhaps it is because we are isolated in our gaming habits, playing alone with others online. Where has the fun gone? It is a question I cannot answer and indeed for many it is a question that needs not be asked. Gaming is continuing to grow meaning that more and more people are being introduced to the medium that I enjoy. Maybe it is a question directed at the wrong party. As we all grow we change and perhaps I have outgrown the current state of play and need only to wait for new games that suit my tastes better. Every year it seems that the industry embraces a new direction and that change is a vital part of what has made gaming so successful. Online multiplayer, social networking and portable gaming are changing how and where we game, adding new frustrations and dynamics to the fray. Come back June 14th and take a look at how games have changed right here on Special Topics.